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After the Rage: When the Anger Is Gone but the Fear Remains
There was a time when my anger filled every room.Rage episodes. Explosions. Words I couldn’t take back.That part of my life is over. And yet—this is not the victory story I imagined. I no longer blow up. I no longer terrify the people I love with my volume or my volatility. From the outside, it…
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How Do You Communicate When There’s Years of Resentment Between You?
For men doing the long, painful work of change I am not a therapist… I am just a guy trying to do the work. Some days I win, some days I fail. That being said, fifteen years is a long time to carry anything—love, pain, resentment, hope. When you’ve been working on yourself for years—therapy,…
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The Boredom of Self-Control
After a while, managing your anger can start to feel… boring. In the beginning, it felt like a battle. Every day was a test of whether you’d hold it together or lose control. You could feel the struggle in your body. There was adrenaline, guilt, hope, fear — all tangled up in the fight to…
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Living With the Past Without Letting It Own the Present
I’ve been working on myself for a long time now. Things are better—better than they used to be, that’s for sure—but I can’t lie: I still get stuck. The past doesn’t just go away. I know I’ve done horrible things. I’ve hurt the person I love the most. I’ve said things I can’t take back.…
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Getting Back on Track After a Setback
How to Right the Ship and Move Forward Again It’s a familiar story. And in the aftermath, the mind often presents two stark options: “We need counseling immediately, or this relationship is doomed.” But here’s the truth—between counseling and separation lies a vast landscape of choices. There are dozens of ways to repair, recalibrate, and…
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The Silent Burn: Resentment as a Hidden Driver of Outbursts
Most men I’ve worked with don’t think of themselves as resentful — just frustrated, fed up, or tired of being misunderstood. But resentment is often the quiet fuel source behind sudden bursts of anger, bitterness, or even emotional shutdown. It’s the low, slow burn that builds over time. And if you don’t know it’s there,…
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When the Rage is Gone: What Comes After
There’s a part of the journey that no one talks about.It’s not the bottom — not the moment everything falls apart. It’s the part after that, when the dust has settled and the rage has gone quiet, but nothing has grown back yet.Just silence. Emptiness. Sadness. Isolation. Seclusion. That’s where I am now. I’ve really…
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The Inner War: From People-Pleasing to Presence
For men with anger issues, freedom begins with inner discipline—not approval. Many men with anger issues find themselves trapped in a quiet cycle: trying to please everyone around them, worrying what others think, and feeling perpetually disconnected from their own lives. This lack of presence—combined with people-pleasing—breeds resentment and anxiety, which often explode as anger.…
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The Angry Son: What Our Fathers Taught Us Without Saying a Word
We don’t all grow up with angry fathers. But many of us grew up with men who didn’t know what to do with their anger—men who swallowed it, stewed in it, or let it explode when the pressure got too high. And while we may have sworn we’d never become them, here we are—recognizing familiar…
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Selflessness as a way through Anger
Incorporating selflessness into your anger management strategy can significantly enhance emotional well-being and promote a sense of calm. Engaging in altruistic behaviors not only benefits others but also yields substantial mental health advantages for the giver. The Psychological Benefits of Altruism Research indicates that altruistic actions activate brain regions associated with pleasure, connection, and trust,…